i just want to scream at people i promise i’ll try my hardest to be a good friend i just want to scream that i’m sorry for every time i was ever a dick but really i just want someone to love me and want to be around me and tell me everything’s gonna be ok

i can’t stop crying i’ve been fucking crying all day i hate that i’m such a hard person to be friends with i hate being alone i’m always fucking alone and i know it’s because i’m such a shit person and i have like a 3 year expiration date on friendships because all i do is piss people off. i’m such an anxious mess i just want people to reach out to me and want to be around me and it’s so so hard for me to do that myself and i use fucking bitchiness as a defense mechanism which makes it worse and like jesus christ i legit want to jump in front of a train right now.